In just two days, my first book, Darkwater: A Pastor’s Memoir of Depression and Faith, will officially be released. I’ve been asking you some questions related to themes in the book. I invite you to answer in the comment section!
In the book Darkwater, I talk about hearing the voice of God throughout my life. This is a metaphor – I don’t really hear a voice. But there have been experiences in my life which I have interpreted as messages from God – and the message is always one of love. Sometimes it’s comfort, other times it’s challenge, but always it’s love.
I didn’t want to die. I didn’t want to lose these things. I was so scared of leaving, so scared of losing, and so scared of dying. But I didn’t see any other option. It was leave the church or leave the world. And I couldn’t handle either one anymore. I was broken. I was useless. I had made things so very, very bad. But at the point of desolation, I found grace. And grace told me:
“There is another way.”
I was listening now. I had nowhere else to turn.
“You don’t need to leave forever.”
Darkwater, Chapter 33
Whether you believe in God or not, perhaps you believe that a “higher power” of some sort has given you messages throughout your life. In a few words, what is the overall message you receive?
Scholtes-Blog 
Just rest in my arms.
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Amen. Thank you!
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I can’t do anything in just a few words, so you’re gonna get a lot of words.
You are enough.
You deserve better.
Resting is not quitting.
You can’t pour from an empty cup.
There is always hope. Sometimes you have to be the hope that you’re looking for, though.
Depression lies.
You are not alone.
Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good.
Crap makes good compost.
Only you can do what you do the way that you do it. Even if you feel like it’s the same thing everyone else is doing, you’re doing it your way, and that makes it different and worthwhile. While you’re sitting there thinking you made a cake when someone else also made a cake and no one is going to want your cake, someone else is thinking, “YAY, TWO CAKES!!”
Sometimes, these things hit me when I’m alone and a song comes on the radio. More recently, it’s memes on social media. Ha! A couple came from friends. Some have to do with writing, some with life. I find that many times writing is life, though. ♥♥♥
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These are fantastic. Through my therapy, I’ve been learning to look for
and notice (and believe) messages like this that come to me. Thank you
for sharing this!
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